Reality Overload

I’ll confess that the charm of reality TV has always been lost on me. I just watch these ‘dramas’ with a puzzled eye. The public really can’t get enough of people behaving badly, yelling and screaming at each other or plotting someone’s downfall? Do they not get enough of that in real life? It seems a little redundant to me.

Not all of the shows focus on bringing out the worst in people, of course. I can truly see the attraction of shows like Dancing with the Stars and American Idol, even if they aren't auto-views for me. But for the most part I avoid reality TV like the plague. That obviously can't be said for the younger generation. Before I looked any of these shows up, my youngest son was able to rattle off most of them for me. I don't know whether to be impressed or saddened!

Producers love the shows because apparently they’re cheap to make. I suppose no one character is around long enough to command a high salary. And it's become so easy to be a 'star' on one of these reality shows that we have people pulling outrageous stunts in search for an entrance onto a show of their own. Whether a hoax involving a boy lost in a balloon or crashing a White House party, people are so desperate to get on TV they've taken a radical departure from taste and good sense.

My kids started watching the first episode of THE REAL WORLD and have gone on to introduce me to more reality shows than I ever wanted to see. There are no reality shows I watch regularly, but I’ve seen enough of these that I’m vaguely shocked. And when I discovered that there were more than 200 reality TV shows on, I got a bit nauseated. I guess with 180 channels you have to fill it with something.

Here are some of the reality TV shows that I came across:

Jon and Kate Plus Eight; Punk’d; Jackass; Pimp My Ride; Jersey Boys; Jersey Shore; Biggest Loser; Survivor; The Hills; The City; Amazing Race; Big Brother; The Real World: The Ruins; Supernanny;

Supermanny; Dance Your Ass Off; Dating in the Dark; Top Chef; Top Chef Masters; Tori and Dean; The Next Food Network Star; More to Love; Extreme Home Maker; Real Housewives; American Idol; America’s Got Talent; Dog the Bounty Hunter; So You think you can Dance; Dancing with the Stars; America’s Top Model; Cops; Hell’s Kitchen; I Love New York; The Bachelor; The Bachelorette; Flavor of Love; Beauty and the Geek; Pawn Stars; Parental Control; The Ultimate Fighter; The Contender; The Dog Whisperer; Operation Repo; Parking Wars; The Sing-Off; Iron Chef; Bride Zilla; Wife Swap; Little Couple; Seventeen and Counting; I Didn’t Know I was Pregnant; Mystery Diagnosis; Making the Band

America’s Next Top Dance Crew; Rock of Love; My Redneck Wedding; Strictest Parents; The Apprentice

Gene Simmons Family Jewels; Keeping up with the Kardashins; Iron Chef; What Not to Wear; House Hunters; Dirty Jobs; From G’s to Gents; Myth Busters; Ghost Hunters; The Girls Next Door;The Real Wedding Crashers.

How about you? Are any of these shows auto views for you? Or do you have another reality show that's a favorite?

Work In Process – Cover

 

BelleBooks is very happy to be doing a fabulous, quirky, Southern women’s fiction novel next spring.  Here’s the concept for Jean Brashear’s cover.  (Do remember that we don’t do all the final meticulous fiddling until we settle on the cover.  Now that this IS the cover, we’ll go back and tinker with everything again to get things just like we like them.)

 

Winner!

Of Stephanie Tyler's contest is JODER!

Please email Michele your snailmail address to toastfaery@gmail.com

Congrats!

Why can't it be Purple Friday?

It just sounds so much more pleasant, doesn't it?  A nice royal color that sends out good vibes to one and all.  But no, it is Black Friday.  Black, because supposedly this is the day of the year that puts store ledgers back in the black.  It is a day some look forward to all year.  A day others rue.

I used to be one of those who preened the ads on Thanksgiving Thursday and plotted out my moves for the following day.  That's when my kids were younger and getting a deal on toys was essential.  Alas, this sacred day of uber-shopping has lost its glimmer.

I still look over the ads, but only the few stores that interest me.  Is it just me, or are there no exciting deals this year?  Nothing compels me to want to get up early.  No must-haves.  I had hoped retailers would have enticed us with major deals.

Now I don't even bother to wake early.  I get up my usual time.  I get to the stores when I get there.  Sometimes it's 10:00, other times it's afternoon.  The way I look at it, if there is something I want, and it's still there when I arrive, then it was meant to be.  If it's gone, then I didn't really need it, did I?   I honestly don't need anything this year (or ever), but I do like to check the DVD television series sets.

But this year I'm going to avoid the stores all-together.  I went to Amazon and put a couple DVD sets in my wish list.  Supernatural season 4, Big Bang Theory season 2, and Weeds season 5.  Tomorrow I'll check back.  If they're on sale, I'll order them.  If not, I'll get back to work, because this story ain't finishing itself, and it's due on my editor's desk on Tuesday.  Sigh...

What about you?  Are you a Black Friday die-hard?  Or do you seclude yourself away from retail stores today?  If you have been out shopping already, what did you get?  What are your strategies?  Find any good deals?  

Michele

Guest: Stephanie Tyler

Please welcome Stephanie to the passenger seat today!  (Well, we wouldn't let her drive and chat now, would we?)  

Thanks so much to Michele for the invite to guest blog – I’m honored because wow, the amount of talent in that header is pretty amazing.  I’m in great company.

Well, let’s see, tomorrow’s Thanksgiving for me – and it’s book release week for me as well – my debut single title (and the first in a back to back trilogy) Hard to Hold released on Tuesday and I’m pretty much bouncing off the walls about it.  (You can read an excerpt and more here on my site.) So the whole, giving thanks is pretty fitting.  And it got me thinking about the past eight years that I’ve been writing and how far I’ve come…and who’s helped me along that journey.

I remember Nora Roberts once said that she has the same friends now as when she started out writing – and I’m pretty happy to report I’m going in that same direction.  Of course, I’ve met some amazing new authors, but nothing beats those authors you came up the ranks with, the ones you helped pick up when they admitted rejection and the ones you cheered on when they got their call. 

The person in my life – writing or otherwise - who I could not live without (and I tell her this all the time, except I typically say, you can never leave me) is author Larissa Ione. 

We met online long before either of us were published.  And then we ended up getting published within 3 days of one another.  And then we sold a series that we co-write about three weeks later (Sydney Croft.) 

She is my go-to person about everything. We’re been through hurricane stuff, kid stuff, writing meltdowns and everything in between, so she’s more than a writing friend – simply put, she’s one of my best friends.

And when my life went haywire this month (right in time for, oh, I have a book to promote too?) she stepped in and went to town talking up my book.  She’s nervous and exited as if this is her own book, and in so many ways, it is, because I never would’ve come this far without her.

She’s an awesome writer and an awesome friend.  I know she helps a lot of authors out there, aspiring or otherwise and I know she deserves every bit of success she’s gotten – and will get in the future.

So, whether you’re celebrating Thanksgiving tomorrow or not, who is the person in your life you’d like to thank and why?  

I’m giving away a set of Larissa’s 1^st 3 Demonica books to one very lucky reader who comments!

Stephanie

The Gratitude Attitude

It doesn't take the upcoming holiday to make me think of all the things I'm thankful for. Not really. Little things pop into my head on a daily basis that have me sending up a silent prayer of thanks. I'm frequently thankful, for example, for men.

That's right. I said it. And not for the reason you all are thinking, either. (Especially you, Gerard. I know how your mind works!) I make no secret of the fact that I am height challenged. And techno-challenged. And sadly, I also have no sense of direction. It comes in handy to live with someone who wouldn't qualify as tall, but who can reach something on top of the refrigerator without dragging out the step stool. Who can open jars or stuck windows. And who has a suggestion when I call him from the land line to complain about my cell phone not working. (Ohhhh. *That's* what that button is for.) He also programs my in-dash GPS system before I set out for a trip. Maybe it's just because he wants the Suburban back eventually, but still--appreciated.

I also am frequently thankful that I don't live in the Mid East. No bias here, but I tend to think I'd do poorly in a climate where women are supposed to act quiet and subservient, at least in public. Demure is beyond me. I'd be the poster girl for public caning, so it's just as well that I was born in the U.S. where everyone loves a smart ass. Or at least can't beat them legally.

And I'm thankful for humor. How dull would life be without it? My particular brand skates perilously close to irreverent, but I also appreciate it in others, luckily for my husband. (Last night I told him, "The dog jumped up when I was cutting the meat and grabbed a big piece of fat and dragged it under the table to chew on." To which he responded, "Didn't that hurt????")

Throughout the years when all the kids were home, I said a frequent prayer of thanks that I had four boys and one girl and not vice versa. I'm hugely grateful for my daughter, and my life would be much much emptier without her. But if I'd had to raise more than one of her...prison orange is an unattractive color on *anyone*.

There's more, of course. I'm thankful for Mark Harmon and Johnny Depp ('cuz a girl's gotta dream ). For books and movies that entertain and provoke thought. Democracy. For Doctor McGillicudy's (don't knock it 'til you've tried it!). For job stability. For my family. For that new stuff that makes my eyelashes grow. My health. Strides in the plastic surgery field (there's nothing graceful about aging from where I stand). For grandchildren. For online shopping and free shipping. The Internet. And for white sand beaches edged by turquoise waters.

How about you? What tops your list of items to be thankful for this season?

Is it the morphine or is it my muse?

I was scheduled to give a workshop called Hogtying the Muse last Saturday, and I have to tell you I wasn’t feeling very ‘amused.’ You see, two weeks earlier I had snapped both bones in my right forearm, making typing (and my January deadline) seem pretty hopeless. But I had promised to be inspiring (yikes) so I tried to figure out how to engage that elusive muse. Toward that end, I searched through a few magazines and skimmed a couple self help books, but I didn’t find much. It was later on, frustrated by my inability to do…well...pretty much anything…and feeling patently sorry for myself, that I began thumbing through some photo albums…and voila…there she was. Ms. Muse!

It turns out that my girl hangs out in the strangest places:

Hiking to the tops of mountains.

Straddling a racing horse.

Sleeping on moon shadowed beeches.

I realized, really for the first time, that its when I step out of my comfort zone that I feel most inspired. That, in fact, each of my adventures has sparked an idea for a book. And more than that…has filled those ideas with lush imagery and heart-palpating sensations.

So although a few intelligent, well-meaning friends have suggested that I start being a little more careful, I think my sadistic little muse might be disappointed if I did. Well, her and my eldest son, who just called and asked if I was going to climb Mt Kilimanjaro with him or what?

We’re now planning the trip for 2013. I'll be officially old, but I’m hoping Ms. Muse likes Tanzania.

But when is enough enough? Am I being foolish? My mother in law seems to think I’m one banana short of a full bunch to take the risks I do, but I’m kind of afraid to wake up one morning and realize life has somehow zipped past me. That I’m 80 years old and have no stories to tell. Then again, I’m rather afraid of pain, too. This little arm debacle was enough to make me morphine’s biggest admirer.

So what do we do? Do we keep bounding through life like huskies through fresh snow or do we begin to employ a little judicious caution in our…ahum…mature years?

Check it out on Monday

Dear Author is posting my "Call" story and Reading Minnesota is featuring my Mirabelle Island stories on Monday. Stop by and check 'em out!

Helen

Friday's Winner is...

...Marcia in OK!

Please send you mailing address to kathleen.eagle@comcast.net, and Kathleen will mail you an autographed copy of IN CARE OF SAM BEAUDRY.

Thanks for a terrific discussion on Friday, everybody. The topic continues to be covered in the media, and I'm glad to see that so many in the medical community are in agreement with most of us. Breast cancer is a major health concern for women, and mammography is still the best tool available for early detection. Look to your health, ladies. One life in 1,900 saved every year in this country is a lot of lives. But we need better tools. And won't it be wonderful when we have a cure?

Kathleen's Talking Boobs. Seriously.

So you want to mess with my right to bare boobs under the watchful eye of the mammo meter, huh? You call yourself a Task Force? I'll show you force, boys. You can have my mammogram when you take it from my cold, dead breasts.

We've all heard the news from the U.S. Preventive Services Task Force--a panel of 16 medical experts (half of them women) appointed to advise the Department of Health and Human Services on the effectiveness of various screening techniques. They're saying that women in their 40s should not routinely have mammograms and that women over 50 should have mammograms every two years instead of annually. Why? They say that every-other-year screenings could provide 80 percent of the benefits of annual screening while cutting the risks almost in half. And just what are the benefits? Mainly not dying from breast cancer. The risks? The possibility false positives and unnecessary biopsies.

Okay, ladies, let's think about this. This panel is supposed to tell us whether mammograms do more good than harm for women of various ages. But what good are they talking about and what harm? They're talking about statistics. They say that ff screening begins at age 40 and is performed every other year, mortality reduces by a median 19.5% compared with beginning screening at age 50, but false-positives, unnecessary biopsies and anxiety increase.

Mortality. That means if you're in the 19.5%, you're dead. Right? Or am I missing something?

Anxiety. Hmm. Does the picture on the right scare you? Me neither. I've given birth three times and had a kidney removed. I can smile all the way through the mammogram. I've had two breast biopsies--both turned out to be calcifications. Were they unnecessary? Daddy's two sisters died from breast cancer. Just because my results were negative (hooray!) doesn't mean the tests were unnecessary. "Chances are, it' a calcification," the doctor said. "But we can't know for sure without a biopsy." Not having the biopsy is going to give me some anxiety. So I say, let's find out for sure, Doc.

I'm not convinced by statistics. I'm interested in people. I have to check several of the risk boxes when I fill out the form on mammogram day, but I know that most people who get breast cancer--upwards of 80% (some say 75, some say 90)--are not in any of the high risk categories. But I'm wondering what other women know. We need to talk, ladies. Do you have a story to tell? Because that's how women get to be so smart. They talk to each other.

Here's my story. I'm the kind of kid who goes by the rules, so I've always had the annual physical, complete with mammogram starting at 40. When my baby sister reached her 40th birthday, she hemmed and hawed around. "Get thee into the vise," said I. And she did. She had a stage 2 tumor. Malignant. She was a single mom, and her little girl was 5 years old. My sister is a survivor. Now, remember, they used to say that breast cancer on your mother's side was a risk factor, but not your father's side. They used to say a lot of things. In ten years, the new recommendations will fall under the category of what they used to say.

So what do you think of the new report? What have you heard? What's your experience? I'll send out an autographed copy of In Care of Sam Beaudry to one of today's commenters.

P.S. Sam's brother's book, ONE COWBOY, ONE CHRISTMAS, has been spotted at B&N, which is a surprise to me. It's a December book. Merry Thanksgiving!

It's shooeee time!

So, I’m cleaning my closet and I’m shocked at what I fine. Shoes, shoes and more shoes. And I don’t know where they came from. So I’ve decided there’s only one explanation: Shoes breed. That HAS to be it because I’ve ended up with more shoes and than I ever remember buying. Those little suckers have managed to multiply all by themselves.

Mind you, I provided them with protection so there is absolutely no excuse for all these unplanned births but, as I said, the proof is in my closet.

Okay. So that argument didn’t wash with my dh either.

I admit it. I LOVE shoes. I'm stupid over shoes, in fact. And it's not just because I'm always hoping that I've finally found the perfect, shoe - both comfort and style wise. The truth is, I sometimes buy them just because they are so cute, or so sophisticated or just so gorgeous. I mean – I work at home right? The dog isn’t impressed by my footwear. Neither are the cats. But oh … the smell of that new leather, the shine on those toes, the spike of that heel….

Ahem. I could go on and on … but then there’s the flip side.

Shoes hurt. Pretty shoes at any rate. At least they hurt my feet, which I admit, I ruined when I hiked the Grand Canyon. But still, more often than not if some amazing pair of shoes in a store window catches my eye, I’m drawn inside. I HAVE to try them on – 3 inch heels and pointed toes notwithstanding. And once I see myself in them, oh, well, it’s all over. I’m convinced that they are not only gorgeous and sexy and make a real fashion statement, but that they are comfortable. I’m in LOVE! I’m on some pheromone high that blocks pain.

Then I get them home. I proudly take them out of the box, admire them again, hug them to my breast and unable to resist, slip into them one more time --- and pain stabs through all five toes and shoots all the way to my ankle.

Whoops … I’ve done it again.

Now I have another pair of shoes that I may never wear … although I’ll want to in the worst possible way.

I have a whole box of shoes (and a few purses that I just HAD to have) in my trunk, ready to take to Goodwill. Someone will get some good out of them. Maybe someone as cute as this little penguin in his blue shoes :o0

Have I learned my lesson? Probably not. It’s a sickness. One I’m trying to recover from … until I see the next pair that just beg to be bought.

I’m also trying to break an addiction to Santa Claus. I have SO many Santas that I’ve run out of places to put them. But every year, someone comes out with something so cute and so hard to resist …. No. I’m drawing the line. No more Santas. No more Santas. Really, no more Santas.

What about you? Have you got a weakness for shoes or purses or Santas or anything else? Or have you found the perfect shoe that's both stylish and comfy and goes with anything? And if so, please tell me where I can get it.

Please welcome Terry Kate!

Terry Kate is the creator of Romance in the Backseat, a website dedicated to romance!! Terry graduated from SUNY Purchase Film Conservatory in 2006. She has made documentaries on three continents, working with AFPRO - Action For Food Production in India, as well as the BLM. In March of 2009 she began shooting video interviews with authors set in the backseat of often driving vehicles. So ... we've got Terry's in the FRONT seat of the convertible today - match made in heaven right? Please give Terry a warm welcome!

I am so very glad and honored to be allowed to be a guest on such a great blog. I came here and was so excited to see that we share a love not just of books, but for another of my greatest joys, horses. I love them. They are big, smelly, and wonderful!

So wonderful in fact that I wanted to make a documentary about them while in film school - I was not always trying to lure authors into the backseat of a car for video interviews like I do today for my site RomanceintheBackseat.com! I visited a number of horse rescues, protection groups, and shot interviews - none of which ever made it into the actual doc, but that lead me to The Bureau of Land Management's National Wild Horse and Burro Program.

Yes, America has wild horses roaming free, they have even been protected in America since 1971 with
The Wild Free-Roaming Horses and Burros Act of 1971 - which states
"That Congress finds and declares that wild free-roaming horses and burros are living symbols of the historic and pioneer spirit of the West; that they contribute to the diversity of life forms within the Nation and enrich the lives of the American people;"
Which I always found very poetic for a law. As readers and authors we are all seeking characters and tales that embody the spirit of a time and bring us closer to those who lived in the past, those whose lives today may be taking place on the other side of the country/world/street, or those filled with supernatural forces not found beyond the page. It is a feeling that tightens my chest when I see the magic of a horse running, mane and tail flowing back in the wind.

It saddens my heart that all the majesty comes with practical concerns. Land and water are precious commodities and in short supply for populations without natural predators and so it is that wild horses are culled from the herds and put up for adoption. What truly moved me in my visits to these adoptions and interviews with Mustang enthusiasts was the heart and love they received. The horses own natural curiosity and social nature that brings them to us while we are drawn to them makes for a great long standing friendship. Even those who had adopted older horses that never really got accustomed to being ridden, all they had to say was the love and joy they found in a mustang. They grow fat on no food, they drink less, they need no shoes, they carry twice the load with more ease, and one and all talked of the great spirit they found in the horse they adopted.

The Spirit that lead us to treasure these animals as a part of us and out heritage. I am a first generation American, the horses I visited at the adoptions have a far longer family history in this country then I. It is a tradition I am proud that we honor in the protection and preservation of wild horses and one I hope someday to support by welcoming a wild mustang into my life.
Please share any stories you might have about and I would like to thank everyone who has been able to open their stable doors to a part of our American Heritage.

To find out more about the project you can visit http://www.romanceinthebackseat.com or http://www.romanceinthebackseat.com/aboutritbs.htm