Worst Cover Contest

As I may have mentioned a time or ten, winter’s been long, hard and kind of grumpy here in the Northland. And I need some time to play and laugh and poke fun.

So…for your viewing delight, I hereby present RWTTD’S WORST COVER CONTEST.

Below you will find some fine examples of how good books go bad, each submitted by the author. Please peruse the pictures and let us know who you think has the absolute worst cover. The winning/losing author will receive an Amazon gift card, as will one commenter/voter.

#1
#1 I believe this little number is a strong contender. Real Men Sell Bras, was a 2003 title written and submitted by Cathy McDavid. You are a brave and much appreciated woman, Cathy.















#2 Trish Morey tells us that The Spaniard's Blackmailed Bride, “has morphed into Love Bites. He's so cross eyed he can't even see those choppers closing in.”

Point taken.










#3 Karen Templeton affectionately calls this the Pepto-Bismol Lady cover. Apparently, the protagonist is supposed to be holding a baseball mitt in her hands, but general consensus is that it looks like a large chunk of German Chocolate cake.

Yummy.



#4 C.S. Chatterly, author of Incorrect Spelling, says she thinks her smurf-like hero looks as if he may be on crack.

Maybe, but he has great abs, and sometimes a girl can't ask for more than that.









#5 This novel is titled MEDICINE MAN. According to Cheryl Reavis, the hero was a twenty-something Navajo 82nd Airborne paratrooper. Perhaps in different light, he would actually look Navajo...or twenty-something, but our intrepid author still seems to believe the model might have been someone’s balding brother-in-law who just happened to be in need of a job. She would like to mention that she likes the flowers in the background. Though, of course, they had absolutely nothing to do with the book.














#6 The Greek's Virgin in Hebrew probably translates as The Greek's Extreme Makeup Collection. It comes complete with nanna's crochet table cloth and coasters that double for head wear.

This is another of Trish Morey's notable entries.















#7 Oh look! Olive Oyl with a martini, sitting on a...television, I believe.

Thanks, Julie. This one made me laugh out loud.













#8 In the Hebrew version of A Virgin for the Taking, Trish tells us, her heroine looks as if “she's been taken by alien hairdressers and spat out again, sans her clothes.” Our intrepid author also spoke of some kind of dead animal hanging from protagonist's ears.

Hmm, dead animals. Check.


#9 This entry is our own Michele Hauf's. Personally, I don't see the problem here (please note other entries) but apparently she finds the hero less than heroic. (Oh please, remember the blue smurf cover?)

Although Hauf's name was spelled wrong on the spine, and that's enough to make any author a little miffed.










And for #10 I submit my own My Desperado done in Norwegian. Being the equine fanatic that I am, I always wanted a horse on one of my covers. This book cured me of that desire. I also no longer want people.


There you have it. Eight lovely entries for your consideration. So have a vote, and tell us the truth, after seeing these strong contenders, how important are covers when you make your book purchases? Have you ever bought a novel because the cover was fabulous? Have you ever bought one because it was hideous? Or, have you, as an author, ever gotten one that made you cry? Be brave, my friends. After all, I’ve shown you my horse-rearing-on-the-guy’s-head cover.

'Nuf said.













www.loisgreiman.com