It all started with Cindy deciding to come up from her home state of Iowa to chilly Minnesota to visit, do a few book signings, and chat with our local writers group. And from there it digressed.
"Let's think of something special to entertain Cindy," Lois said. "To celebrate her NYTs showing."
Yeah, right. Lois has been dying to see the Chippendale male dancers her entire adult life (quite possibly even before that) and Cindy was just the excuse to get her there. But first she had to rope in a few accomplices. A Rider field trip, if you will. Research for romance writers. Tax deductible, you think?Where do I start?
Oh, yeah. Naked men and screaming women.
We were in an auditorium with at least 1,000 other woman, most of them a good decade younger than us and several drinks ahead of us. It was like nothing I've ever seen before.
The guys come out onto the stage and, well, dance (in a not entirely synchronized fashion, but who cares, right?) women go crazy. That about sums it up. Except for the part where the guys cruise through the audience rubbing up against, hugging or kissing any woman willing to stuff a few bucks into his tightie whities.
You should have seen Lois. And Cindy. You'd think they never got out of their houses at night. Never scene a man's naked chest and, ahem, you know ... bum. Now I know why they made me stop at that gas station on the way down. They said they needed change. Ones.
Trust me, they were all over those guys. (And if they try telling you otherwise later today, don't believe a word they say.) Let's just hope their dhs don't read this blog.This is our whole crew with some of the dancers after the show. In the front row, it's Ann Bleakley, dancer, dancer, Michelle Buonfiglio, dancer and Tina Plant. Back row, sweet little innocent me, Lois (the trouble maker), dancer, Cindy (Lois's partner in crime), dancer, Amy Kennedy-Fossen, and Marcia, owner of A Novel Place bookstore in Osseo.
Honestly, we had fun. It was a female bonding experience to remember.
So what's was your best girls night out? Ever been to see male strippers? Isn't it interesting how women going to see male strippers seems to be socially acceptable, but men seeing female strippers is considered sleazy and crude?
Here's another pic of the guys with just a couple of us. That's Lois and Cindy and I have no clue who that other chick is and what she might be doing with that male stripper.I'm innocent, I tell you. Innocent.
And we've got a fun treat from Cindy, Lois and me. One of this week's lucky commentors will receive a 2009 Chippendales calendar. It's pretty cool. Check back Saturday for info on the lucky winner!
HOLD THE PHONE: Cindy here, Totally unwilling to let sweet innocent "why I just sat there and blushed 'til I got the vapers," Helen get by with her goodie two shoes act.
I was merely being the polite, affable out of town guest, going along with the plan and working quietly in the background on: a) research material, b) my concern, in my meek grandmotherly fashion, about those poor boys catching a chill, and c) trying to keep Helen out of the local jail. I mean really. I AM a grandmother. This 'field trip' was far below my standards (picking up strange men in bars not withstanding). Helen was OUT OF CONTROL. What Helen said about Lois, though? All true!! The woman is an animal and there might be a Chippendale or two with the the teeth marks to prove it. Do note which Riders are either sitting on or exposing themselves to, those poor defenseless boys (Hint: it's Lois and Helen) and which Rider is standing quietly in the background behaving like a lady. Just because you can't see my hands, doesn't mean they're someplace they shouldn't be.
Lois wrote:
Liars!! They’re both liars I tell you. I know I’m a little late showing up to discount their stories, but that’s not because I needed 36 hours to recuperate or anything. I’m perfectly fine. What vodka?
Anyway, okay, the Chippendales trip may have been my idea. But I felt that as writers, professional writers, it was our responsibility, our duty, if you will, to experience such an event. But let me assure you, I conducted myself in an extremely lady-like fashion all evening. I was, I admit, a bit shocked by the others. But then, Cindy is from Iowa and well…Enough said. As for Helen, the woman has more hands than an octopus. They were everywhere. Even trying to shove me forward into the sweaty, hard-muscled, nicely…Well, what I’m trying to say is she tried to force me on some of the gentlemen, but I assure you, I resisted. As for Tina Plant, I do believe I saw her with a dollar bill stuck in her bodice. That’s right. In her bodice. Don’t think I put it there. That would have been wrong. And weird!!
Marcy the bookseller--I was shocked. There was yelling…actual, rather lewd suggestions regarding what the gentlemen should do with their attire.
Buonfiglio, well, if you know Michelle of Lifetimetv.com, there’s no need for explanations. And Amy, just cuz it was your birthday…really! Ann Bleakley! Seriously, the woman doesn’t even drink, so there were no excuses.
Honestly, I’m quite embarrassed for all of them.
