Tuesday, August 17, 2010

From Click To Commitment/Kate Carlisle

We are soooo lucky to have Kate Carlisle today with the Riders!  She was a NYT bestseller with her first hardcover mystery and she also writes Silhouette Desires.  Let’s give her a big welcome!


Recently, I began reading a nonfiction book titled Click, which explores that magical moment when we instantly and inexplicably connect with certain people. That “Wow, I like you!” moment.
Like at first sight.
During this serendipitous moment, say authors Ori and Rom Brafman, dopamine hypercharges the brain in a reaction very much like getting high on drugs. Most of us have experienced this euphoria at least once in our lives, whether romantically or with someone destined to be a friend. Right from the start, we feel energized in each other’s company. We laugh more, and we do our best to make the other person laugh because it’s just so fun.
We are, to put it simply, on.
We’re in the zone. We truly like this new person in our lives, and we feel thrilled and excited because it seems as though he or she likes us, too.
But here’s the coolest part: Unlike with narcotics, the high that comes with “quick-set intimacy” with another human being can last for years. For life.
The Brafmans cite a Dutch study of a thousand random couples who had been married an average of 25 years. The couples whose relationship started with that immediate click and a headlong fall into love were more likely to agree with deeply romantic statements such as “I cannot imagine another person making me as happy as [my spouse]” and “I melt when I look deeply into [my spouse’s] eyes” than were couples who married after a long, traditional courtship. Remember, they agreed with these deeply romantic statements after 25 years of marriage.
In other words, the magic can last.
Love can and does last.
Romance novels such as The Millionaire Meets His Match, my first release with Silhouette Desire, take readers on the journey from this Click to the moment when the characters embrace the truth of it. We follow the characters from click to commitment.

Cynics claim that our novels are unrealistic, but we know the truth. Sure, there may be an element of fantasy in romance novels. Adam Duke, the hero of The Millionaire Meets His Match, is rich enough to own a private jet and a luxurious mountain resort. Not the typical man you might meet every day. But what readers respond to is a core, emotional truth. They respond to that click of connection between Adam and Trish and between the heroes and heroines of other romance novels.
These two people are meant for each other. When we finish the last page, we believe that in 25 years, Adam and Trish will still melt when they look into each other’s eyes. From the plush leather seats of their private jet, of course.
So the next time someone says something snarky about romance novels being unrealistic, tell them that science is on our side. And tell them that Kate Carlisle says, “So there!”
Have you ever instantly clicked with another person? A significant other, friend, or co-worker? Tell me what you remember about that moment. Does your relationship still exist today? And is your connection as strong as it was at the beginning? I’d love to hear from your friend, too, so feel free to forward the link to this blog!

Kate grew up in a big family near the beach in Southern California. She spent over twenty years working in television production. She also studied acting and singing, toiled in vineyards, collected books, joined a commune, sold fried chicken, modeled spring fashions and worked for a cruise ship line, but it was the year she spent in law school that finally drove her to begin writing fiction. The Millionaire Meets His Match is her first release with Silhouette Desire. She is also the author of the New York Times bestselling Bibliophile Mysteries series, featuring rare book expert Brooklyn Wainwright, whose bookbinding and restoration skills invariably uncover old secrets, treachery and murder.  www.katecarlisle.com 



Jane said...

Hi Kate,
Congrats on the release of your first Desire. There have been several times where I met a person at school and work and I knew right away that we were going to be good friends. I remember asking someone next to me for the notes from the previous class that I missed. We started talking and discovered that we take the same train and lived only a few stops from each other. She remains one of my best friends.

Betina Krahn said...

Yes, Congratulation, Kate, on your Desire! And hey-- let's spread a little of that private jet action around, eh? I've never been on one-- probably never will be, but talk about fantasy! That has to be one of the prime fantasies for both men and women-- winging it across country in a posh leather chair with a cool drink in hand, waiting for a gourmet lunch. . . and no screaming kiddos or long-legged businessmen bumping the back of your seat. Heaven.

And that "click moment"-- I can personally verify that it's real. Late hubs and I had sucha moment the night we met. And the Pool boy and I had a similar moment the night we met in person. Both times I remember thinking "This is IT. This is what it feels like to know something is meant to be."

Kate Carlisle said...

Good morning! Thank you so much for having me here. I'm a California girl, so I have a thing for convertibles.

Jane, Isn't that a fun moment, when you first meet someone you know is going to become a good friend? It's almost like you recognize each other already. Everything she says makes you laugh, and everything you say makes her laugh. Such a joyful moment.

Kate Carlisle said...

Betina, thank you so much! It is a thrill to be published with Desire. I will have books out in the coming months for Adam Duke's brothers, but I don't know how the art department is going to top my first cover. I just love the cover of The Millionaire Meets His Match!

Thank you for sharing your wonderful story of that click moment. You brought tears to my eyes.

Kate Carlisle said...

By the way, if you want to see a "click" moment, go to my Facebook page (facebook.com/katecarlislebooks) and watch the video of Jennifer Aniston and her new boyfriend. It's really an amazing video. While you're there, I hope you'll click Like on the top of the page!

Helen Brenna said...

Hi, Kate, and congrats on your first Desire!

Click is such a great way to describe these moments. Have felt them several times in my life. Some of those "click" people are still in my life, others not, but it's still a great experience when it happens!

Nancy said...

Kate, I love this "click" theory. I'll have to get that book and read it.

I agree that what readers relate to in the books is that click, that sense of rightness between the hero and the heroine. Not being idiots, readers know the relationships in romance novels have some unlikely elements. What the genre's critics overlook is the fact that every novel has its unrealistic facets, offering readers life as they'd like it to be, not necessarily as it is.

Anyway--great blog, and I see you have another wonderful cover coming up for Brooklyn!

Kate Carlisle said...

Hi, Helen! Thanks for popping over, and thanks for the congratulations. I'm so excited to be part of the Desire family!

Hi, Nancy! Yes, there are sometimes idealized elements to romance novels, but love is not unrealistic. Love is an ideal that can be achieved. In fact, it is achieved every day, and it can and does last. Of course, I'm preaching to the choir here. :D

Donna MacMeans said...

I think the dh and I clicked in that Cleveland bar 38 years ago. Yeah - I'm a romantic. I admit it.

Hey - is that your new cover down there - The Lies that Bind? Love it! Don't remember seeing it before. You do get the beauties, Kate.

Cindy Gerard said...

Welcome, Kate!
And thanks for the Jennifer Aniston link. I needed a good laugh this morning - and am always looking for a diversion for working :o)
Love the Click concept and yes, it's absolutely happened to me!

Anna Sugden said...

Ooh I love your new cover, Kate! Can't wait to see what Brooklyn et all get up to in her next adventure.

I'm saving your delicious Desire until I hit my writing target - it's tough having that hunk staring out at me from the top of my TBR pile ... tempting.

Yes, had that click moment with my lovely hubby and with my dearest friends. And, yes, the relationships are still going strong after all these years.

BTW I think you get it with authors too - you pick up a book and read the first few lines and just know this author writes keepers!

Leanne said...

Kate, I loooove this blog! We do feel that click both romantically and with friends. Too cool. Welcome to the convertible and huge congrats on your releases!

Kate Carlisle said...

Donna, Yes, that's my new cover! Can you hear me squealing from there? Squeeeeeeeeee! I adore my Bibliophile Mysteries covers. I'm convinced that the cover of Homicide in Hardcover played a big role in its landing on the New York Times list. I was an unknown quantity at that point, but the beautiful cover intrigued readers into picking up the book and flipping through the first few pages.

Kate Carlisle said...

Oh, and Nancy, I meant to say that I love that you're proof that the Click can turn into lasting commitment. 38 years and going strong!

Kate Carlisle said...

Cindy, isn't that video hysterical? I've watched it three times now, and I've discovered something new each time. The photos in the magazine of Jennifer Aniston and her new, adopted boyfriend are so cleverly done. And the newscasters' bubbly enthusiasm tickles my funnybone.

(In case you missed it, you can watch that video on my Facebook page, facebook.com/katecarlislebooks.)

Kate Carlisle said...

Anna, Thanks for stopping by! I love the idea of Adam as a reward for finishing your work. He's worth it, I promise.

Excellent point about experiencing the click with certain authors! YES! You read those first few pages, and you feel like you've found a new friend. What a wonderful feeling that is!

Kate Carlisle said...

Leann, Thank you! And thank you again for hosting me here today. I feel especially honored that you're my hostess because you have always been one of my favorite Desire authors.

Now get back to work! I know you're under deadline, and I want to read your next book.

Kathleen Eagle said...

Hi, Kate! Congratulations and welcome to the convertible AND to Silhouette!

There's good hard evidence that the "click" moment is not only real but it's basic to our survival. It's such an essential part of who we are, registers so deeply in our psyche, that we usually carry a photographic memory of that moment with us for the duration.

I have that memory of first laying eyes on Clyde. (We'll celebrate our 40th anniversary in October.) But I also have one from the day back in 7th grade when I connected with my "BFF." It's been 10 years since I last saw her, but you know the feeling. The time that's passed makes no difference. The connection hasn't changed. I left MA for the Midwest right after I graduated from college, but I've made a point to connect with friends as often as I could over the years, and you know the difference when you see them again. With those "click" friends, the basic instinct hasn't changed, and you can really pick up where you left off no matter what's happened in the interim.

Kate Carlisle said...

Kathleen, Thank you so much for the warm welcome. I have to tell you, I'm in love with your new cover for ONCE A FATHER. He is delicious!

How interesting that you and your BFF haven't seen each other for 10 years! Do you speak regularly? You're so right, though, that when you reconnect with those "click" friends, you experience the "click" all over again. It goes deeper than instinct. It's a primal connection we share with some people, and it transcends time and geography.