Tuesday, September 02, 2008

Seduction 101

Betina here. Perplexed by life, as usual.

My current problem is writing related.

If you had to seduce someone (I'd say a man, but I don't want to be exclusionary!)do you have a tried and true method? Something you've personally researched and know to be a winning bit of hoochie-mama magic? A favorite line? A sure-fire passion igniter? A fall-back technique/scenario/method that always works for you? A favorite lead-in to loving that you like to use in your books? Or like to read about?

Me either. sigh.

And since I'm writing sexier in my current work-in-progress, I figured I'd throw out a hook and see if I can reel in any tips or pointers on seduction. I could sure use the help.

See, MY fall-back technique is talking. No surprise there, eh? To me nothing says "ya wanna fool around?" like a little sexy or suggestive talk. But, sooner or later people do get tired of talking. So I've been doing research. I found a book that promises "203 ways to drive a man wild in bed." But that's kind of the cart before the horse. You have to get them into bed before you can drive them wild. Don't you?

Oh. ::blush:: Silly me.

Well, it turns out, many of Ms. 203 Ways's suggestions involve writing notes and leaving them pinned to clothing or sending them tucked into gifts or provocative surprises. Words again. Also sexy telephone calls mid-day. . . reading erotic literature in person or via phone. . . writing and sending erotic poems. . . wearing and describing sexy new underwear. . . or NO underwear.

Is this blog X-rated yet?

So, I got another book that tells you how to seduce people based on their astrological sign.

Taureans' weakness is food. . . so you need to feed them.

Geminis love telephones and fax machines. . . use those to tease and tantalize.

Cancers are focused on domestic tranquility and love their mothers. . . they need to be cuddled and given sentimental gifts.

Aries folk are natural warriors and love the smell of battle. . . challenge them to games and beat them or let them beat you.

Leos are all about luxury and pampering. . . escort them to fine events and locations; give them gifts of obvious quality and style.

Virgos are sincere, natural, and health conscious. . . take them on nature walks and let your inner child free to play.

Librans are sophisticated and proud. . . they respond to flattery, especially when you mean it.

Scorpios are mysterious and passionate. . . a sexy dare will get their attention and a hint of sexual sorcery will keep it.

Sagittarians are impulsive, and adventuresome. . . take them back to your place to see photos of your trek to Tibet.

Capricorns are steady and conservative and crave privacy. . . arrange quiet rendezvous and give watches and power tools as gifts.

Aquarians are the free spirits of the zodiac. . . they need easy, no-strings-attached fun and spiritual-themed gifts.

Pisces people are intuitives who crave creature comforts. . . they need lots of touching and warmed towels and special herbal teas.

Yeah. Well. All very interesting. Maybe even a little true. But, I'm not sure how that helps me write tantalizing seductions between the feisty widow and the prince's best friend. Could I have her eat grapes in front of him or something? How about drizzling his fingers with honey and licking them? Too schnauzer-like? Too needy?

I simply refuse to do another bathing scene seduction. And I'm not crazy about accidental falls into bodies of water, either. That whole "we must get you out of those wet clothes" line just creeps me out. But, I'm desperate here, folks.

Remember the days ( I think it was the 70's) when "marital experts" advised women to wrap themselves naked in Saran Wrap and meet their husbands at the door with a martini? You don't? Did I dream all that? Anyway, that won't work; they didn't have Saran Wrap in Victorian England.

So I'm back to talking. And maybe a little stuff with sexy clothing-- combined with talking. Maybe flashing an ankle. Or a corset. Unless you have a few good suggestions.

So, what's your favorite seduction scenario in a book? Or in real life? Is there a sexy come-hither that just melts you into puddles? Seen a seduction in a movie that just took your breath? Care to share?

Oh, and feel free to use the abbreviated "astrological" seductions above on your favorite zodiac sign. Just be sure to "share" afterward!


Anonymous said...

First - you didn't dream the Saran Wrap. I believe the book was THE TOTAL WOMAN.

I like food seductions, especially in the period pieces. like you did in the Marriage Test. All that oral fixation. Eye contact. Non-verbal communication. Hard to write, I think. So much easier to say words.

Setting too. Fireplace lighting only. On the floor in front of the fireplace.

I'm a little tired of the waltz seduction, the bathing seduction, the accidentally (but on purpose)sees her nekked or getting nekked.

this help at all???

Candace said...

I’ve always thought the seduction while ostensibly doing something ploy was a good method. Dancing works but, as Arkansas Cyndi said, it’s been done. How about seduction through archery? Or golf? Or croquet? Even playing the piano would work—a duet, of course. Any activity where someone can legitimately touch someone else has possibilities

Kylie said...

Well I don't have a wealth of experience in the area, LOL. And my husband would be the first to tell people that he is waaaay more romantic than me.

He's also easy. Disgracefully easy :) So no real technique required.

But for him it's lots of eye contact, during conversation or dancing. Long long drawn out moments of it.

Betina Krahn said...

ArkansasCyndi, you're a peach, remembering the food thing! I must be part Taurus of something because I love the combo of food and drink and loving. One of my favorite early movies was Tom Jones. And the waltz seduction. . . that's been used a lot lately? Those pesky regencies. . .

Candace, the seduction through innocen contact. . . yeah. . . I'm remembering the contact in the movie "Tin Cup". . . Kevin Costner teaching Rene Rousseau to swing a club. Unfortunately, no golf courses in Lake Country England. but I get the idea.

And Kylie-- lol-- your guy being so easy! Lucky you! But you're right, the eye contact is primo! Must remember e-y-e- c-o-n-t-a-c-t.
Gotcha. I'm taking notes!

Michele Hauf said...

Ah, those Cancer men and their mothers. Isn't that the truth. :-(

Strangely, I like the seduction scenes that start out as fights, or actual duels, even. A little swordplay, or maybe a few well-placed punches....who knows where all that frustration can lead. It was done well in Mr. And Mrs. Smith with a fight leading to sex. And I just watched an older episode of Burn Notice (my new favorite show!) last night where the heroine beats on the hero a bit, then they land in bed. Sigh...

Okay, what's wrong with me?

Playground Monitor said...

I remember The Total Woman. I tossed that book in the trash. Wrap yourself in Saran Wrap and your man will buy you anything indeed. It sounded like marital prostitution to me. I'd rather the DH buy me something because he loves me, not because I'm wrapped up like a turkey sandwich.

Speaking of the DH, we've been married so long (35 years this past May) that I've forgotten what seduction is. But dancing does ring a bell. And feeding each other (but avoid honey cause it's too sticky -- been there, done that). My husband gets excited by a juicy rib-eye steak and a homebaked pie. LOL!


Betina Krahn said...

Michele-- lol-- I wondered how many readers would see something they recognized in those little astrological tips!

Anybody else see something they recognize?

Marilyn, I love the turkey sandwich image! And the juicy steak and homebaked pie-- I think that would do it for a lot of men. Heck, it's been known to do it for me!

Keri Ford said...

Michele I am so into Burn Notice too. That is my new favorite show and I wait for thursday nights for it (darn Tennis show is delaying it though!)

Fighting leading to seduction is great. All those emotions have got to end somewhere. The falling in the water doesn't bother me so much unless the heroine is just 'clumsy' and falls in. Monica McCarty (geez I hope I spelled that right!) has a medivel where the heroine tries to escape, boat sinks in icy cold water. What was the way to come back from that kind of cold back in the day? Find another warm body. She did it great and really jacked up the tension in those few pages.

I have no problems with dancing. I mean, dancing was a big part then and you do have to touch. Not so much into the singing pairs. Comes across as corney to me. Don't know why.

Those long looks across the room. No-no touching in the middle of an event, but done in a way where nobody else in the room knows what's going on.

Okay, I think I've rambled quite enough now.

Debra Dixon said...

The sad truth about seducing men is that it really only takes a one word question-- "Sex?"


You've gotten some good answers already, but I'll add that as a reader I love reading scenes in which one party seduces the other while "innocently" doing the most ordinary things and waiting for the seducee to break.

Helen Brenna said...

The talking works for me, Betina, especially if there's lots of fun double entendre in front of other people.

Love the Tin Cup teaching thing too. Either one of them could be teaching the other anything. It's just the physical closeness that's sexy.

It'll come. You're a great character writer and they will enlighten YOU!

Kathleen Eagle said...

Who was it who said that women have the advantage. "All you have to do is show up." Was it a movie line? Comedian? Definitely not Dr. Phil.

Betina Krahn said...

Keri, I kinda like the "fighting nose to nose until one of you breaks down and kisses the other" seduction. And I do like the dancing thing-- in earlier days that was the only contact men and women were allowed in public, so they had to make it count!

Deb-- lol-- the sad truth is that you're right-- it usualy doesn't take much prompting to get a man thinking about sex. But we romance types have to make it look harder than that. . . especially pre-commitment.

Helen, I might have guessed you'd appreciate a "talking" seduction. And since you're athletic, the teach-me-how-to gambit would probably score high with you. But I'm not especially athletic and they still score high with me, too!

And Kathy. . . characters can afford to get headaches and "just show up," but we writers can't! We have to put it out there and make it authentic every time!

Kathleen Eagle said...

I'm thinking it was Harrison Ford saying "All a woman has to do is show up." As opposed to males going to great lengths to seduce, but was that in a movie?

Anyway, I thought there was a great seduction scene in "Witness"--he watches her wash herself--lamplight, sponge, basin, dripping water. Love the dancing foreplay in "Dirty Dancing." Bring in all the senses.