Monday, December 10, 2007

Debra - Trust and Pants

Sadly, I’ve discovered that my son doesn’t trust me. Let me explain...

Saturday night we took him out for a birthday dinner. We met him at the restaurant--early--because he had a full night of festivities. After dinner he had to pick up a birthday cake a girl had made for him and meet the "gang" for lies and pool.

I was wearing new pants. My absolute favorite pants of all time...the "Perfect Pants." I just discovered them a few months ago when a client thought I hadn't charged him enough and sent me a lovely L.L. Bean gift certificate. I was running out of ways to spend it and I thought, what the heck? Try some of their pants. Oh, my gosh! I've never had a pair fit this well.

Since that time, I've told everyone I know about them. They come in several different leg styles, a zillion sizes, including petites and women's. Plus they come in four colors. They wash and dry beautifully. Pack great. My mother, sister and best friend have now invested in these pants. My sister has just ordered the "perfect cords." We're hoping we love them too.

But back to Saturday...I put on my new pants, which I'd bought in a smaller size this time because Atkins has happily made my favorite pants a little sloppy. Hence, the smaller size. Yay, me! But the smaller size is much more form fitting. EEK! I'm used to much baggier clothes.

I knew I couldn't take my husband's word for whether the pants were too tight because he loves me desperately. Again, yay for me! So, I asked my son--who has no problem calling a spade a spade--while we were waiting around outside the restaurant for them to call our table. "Hey, are these pants too tight?"

He looked me straight in the eye and said, "I am not that stupid."

I was torn between pride in having taught him to recognize a potentially tricky question and sadness to know that the kid didn't trust me. But more than that I wanted an honest answer on whether my pants were too tight. "So...they are too tight?"

This time his mouth did turn up slightly at the corner. He almost smiled at my trickery. Then he said, "We are not having this conversation. No matter what I answer you'll ask a followup and we are not going there. So get over it. Move along."

Apparently, I ask trick questions and then grill you about your answers. Who knew?
So, do you ask trick questions? Do you ask follow-ups to be sure the men were clear about what you were asking? (My men never actually answer the question I asked!) And what is your all-time favorite pant?


Jean said...

Deb -- I discovered the Perfect Pants last Christmas, including the cords. Fortunately, I need new ones this year since I, too, am a smaller size now.


Virginia Lady said...

Oh, that is too funny. I have two teenage sons, but my eight yr old is still VERY honest with me. We were watching TV one day and a commercial for a meal diet program played. He said I should get it. I asked him if he thought I needed to lose weight, and he said "Yeah, you do." Just as blunt and honest as could be. Ouch! :-)

MY favorite pants are great, but they are dressy, I can't seem to find anything similar in a more casual style, and the last time I looked, this style wasn't available where I had gotten either. I'm now searching for a new favorite. Which LL Bean pants did you get? Is there a style name or do I need to try on every pair in the store. Not that that couldn't be fun, but my shopping time is limited these days. :-)

Michele Hauf said...

I don't think I ask the trick questions. Because I'm not sure I want to hear an honest answer. ;-)

My favorite pants though, are trick pants. They're a nice pair of jeans I found at WalMart (of all places!). They fit snuggly when I put them on, but by the end of the day, they've loosened up, so I feel like "gee, my pants are so loose; I must be losing weight."

Ha! But you know, it's fun while it lasts.


Helen Brenna said...

Alas, I don't have a pair of favorite pants, unless we can count my fleece pjs?

Yes, I ask trick questions, not so much about how I look - given those up. No point, they've been on to me for years.

My son caught me after dinner one night. He asked if he could have some kind of desert. My response, "Are you still hungry?"

"Ooooh, I'm not answering that one," he said, grabbing a cookie.

Betina Krahn said...

Any question a woman asks regarding her appearance is a trick question. A pity these guys (sons!)have caught onto us so early in life.

But five will get you fifty, that they develop selective amnesia the minute some gorgeous young babe waltzes into their lives. They'll be back to answering questions and getting hammered with follow-ups until they're old experienced husbands-- when they re-learn the lessons of their youth and shut the heck up.

Poor darlings.

And as to my favorite pants. One pair of Ralph Lauren jeans I adore and have never found again. One pair of perfectly cut Jones pants that make me look like I've lost 10 pounds! (Really. Even my sister asks me if I'm losing weight when I wear them! And you know how hard it is to fool sisters!)And of course, I got them on a sale rack and have never seen another model remotely like them. Sigh.

I guess I'll have to try the LL Beans. Style number, please. . .

Debra Dixon said...

Jean-- Yay on the smaller size. Glad to know you like the cords. That bodes well. :)

Virginia Lady-- ROFL ! You're son wins the prize for honesty. That's funny. Darn those boys. Can't live with 'em. Can't kill 'em.

Re: Pants
I wear the boot cut. Either click the link up top in the blog or go to and search for Perfect Pants. It'll pop up a screen with all your choices!

Debra Dixon said...

Michele-- I love the mysterious growing pants! LOL! If we could find a way to have pants respond to emotion by expanding and shrinking based on our need to be comfy or sharp.

Debra Dixon said...

Helen-- I'll give you an amen on the pj pants. My part-timer is working today and BelleBooks has have very casual work rules in my house. She's in PJ pants. LOL! Hey as long as she shows up every time she's scheduled to work and works like a champ while she's here, I have no complaints. I just try and warn her beforehand if it's a day she has to run errands for me.

Debra Dixon said...

Betina-- Why is it that we find things we'd kill for on the sales rack but we can never find them on the real racks?? I normally buy something I love in every color and if it's a basic I buy two.

Check out Search for Perfect Pants. I wear the boot cut but they've got straight leg, slim leg, original, etc.

I can go to dinner in these or go grocery shopping. I desperately needed some nice casual pants.

Cindy Gerard said...

fun post Deb. And I too have the perfect pant that, like most of you, I plucked off a sale rack - Geoffry Bean, I think - and I've never found them again. Urg.
I don't ask the "does my butt look big?" question anymore. Sadly, I know it is and I don't want to force my hubby to lie :o)

Keri Ford said...

I actually just found a pair of jeans from Wal-Mart that I love too. I think they're Levis Strauss (sp?) with the purple tag. So comfortable and denim is so soft.

My DH is typcially honest with me when I ask the 'how do I look' question. I don't know if he's just good at reading my face and tells me what I want to hear (cause sometimes he'll answer with a 'I've seen in you better' and I'm thinking the same thing) or if he's just gotten lucky through the years.

byrdloves2read said...

No trick questions here. I know that no matter what I ask, my DH will say he likes it. But I've got a full length mirror and since I'm my worst critic, I don't really need to ask. sigh

My favorite pants are from Appleseeds catalog. They are stretch jeans made for women, so they come all the way to my waist and are shaped to be smaller at the waist. Um, the stretch part makes them fit looser as the day goes on. Lovely!

Christie Ridgway said...

I've got to go check out these pants! Do they seem pretty true to your regular size, Deb?

As for questions, I do not ask the men in my life about my appearance at all. Son 2 will tell me just what he thinks, though. Darn it.

lois greiman said...

My daughter is the honest one where I'm concerned. We took her and her boyfriend out the other night. My husband said, "great hair." Her boyfriend gave me two thumbs up, and my daughter said, "looks like 80's rockstar hair."

Nope, I don't ask trick questions. Trying to get rid of that masochistic tendency. :)

Debra Dixon said...

Cindy-- You are such a good wife, resisting the urge to make hubby lie. You get the gold stars.

I have not yet evolved. (g)

Debra Dixon said...

Keri-- I'm fussy about the "hand" or feel of the denim too. Hate the stiff starchy kind. I found a shirt that had "tencel" (whatever that is) and I really liked the feel and drape.

Debra Dixon said...

Byrd-- I haven't looked at the Appleseeds catalogue, but if they have the mysterious loosening pants, then I gotta get a catlogue!

Debra Dixon said...

Christie-- I'd say they run pretty true to size. You'd be more likely to exchange for a smaller size than a larger.

Lois! 80's rock star hair ?? LOL! I say, you go, girl. (g)

Susan Kay Law said...

Sadly, the LL Bean perfect pants do not fit me. (If I get them loose enough on the thighs, the waist is huge.) There's a similar land'd end version, though, that fits me pretty well.

My boys would never answer that honestly. Mostly because I don't think they actually know; they tend to think that, physically, the women in their lives are absolutely perfect. Including me. (I take full credit for that, thank you very much.)

But I wish i could find perfect pants. Whenever I do, they change the cut before I can buy another pair. So I am always sad when a favorite pair bites the dust.


Lorena S said...

Debra, congratulations on raising a son who is savvy to the ways of women. However, I've been told my questions are "not fair" (i.e., trick questions) even when I think I'm being pretty straightforward, so I'm pretty sure it's just an excuse. Goodness knows he has no problem answering the ones he wants to -grin-.


Debra Dixon said...

Lorena-- Hey! I think that's my problem too. I'm being serious and they think I've laid a trap. LOL!

flchen1 said...

Hmm... I tend to try to avoid asking too often (probably because I don't actually want to hear the answer), and my sons are still young enough to either speak the truth or not understand the question at all (yes, the littlest is only two, after all...)

I occasionally prod my husband into commenting on my appearance, and he'll usually try to thumbs up or thumbs down something by saying something more like, "I like the other color better" rather than, "Wow, this pair makes you look like a boy, and not in a good way." Heh.

I have a couple pairs of all-time favorite pants--one is a plain unwrinkleable black pair from Target, and another is a pair of jeans my sister gave me (Theory, maybe? I'm really bad with brands...). I accidentally ripped one of the knees but still insist on wearing them sometimes because they do fit otherwise :)